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My life is going well, I like what I do, and I have a good group of friends that I spend time with on the regular. I was thinking of reaching out to a female acquaintance of mine and asking her if she would be down to cuddle with me periodically in a legitimately non-sexual way. I mean, yes, there are definitely weird ways that you could go about asking for your cuddle request to be met, but the intention of wanting to cuddle with someone is totally normal, healthy, and great.

Hence, why I felt compelled to write this article. Human beings are a social species, therefore we were made to connect with each other. And one of the main ways that we connect to each other is through physical contact. Cuddling balances your immune system. It releases tons of oxytocin aka the connection hormone that bonds people naturally and dopamine aka the happy chemical.

It reduces pain and tightness in your muscles. It reduces stress, social anxiety, and lowers your blood pressure and your risk of heart disease. I researched it all. Cuddling feels good for a reason. So how exactly do you go about asking someone to cuddle with you without it being weird?

Believe me, this necessary pit-stop is worth it. The second conversation is about what exactly it is that you are looking for from your cuddle buddy arrangement. Do you think that this is a weird thing to want? Is cuddling normal, healthy, and great? Get comfortable with how you feel about making the request first… and remember, there is nothing strange about wanting physical intimacy with someone in or outside of an intimate relationship.

You are allowed to want to cuddle. And the second conversation to have with yourself starts, and ends, with this question:. Do you want a one-time cuddle? A semi-regular cuddle buddy like once per week? Do you want the cuddling to be fully clothed? Will kissing be allowed? If so, is kissing on the lips only allowed or just on the body? With music or no music?

On a bed or on a couch? You get the drill. Dig into your desires. What is your ideal, best case scenario? What is your authentic desire in terms of your ideal cuddle setup? Sit with that until it becomes quite clear for you, and feel free to write it down somewhere to make it more concrete.

But for now, just check in with yourself, and get your best case scenario down in writing. Asking for our needs to be met in any kind of a relationship can be nerve-racking. Filtered through my personal biases, here are the top five places that I think you should search for your potential cuddle buddies. You might be surprised at their reaction. Similar to the acquaintances, but with a bit of a sexual charge either back then, or still today.

Maybe you bumped into each other at a club years ago… or you matched on OKCupid or Tinder and it fizzled out… or you were both always dating other people whenever one of you happened to be single.

Whatever your history with your old crushes, this might be the perfect opportunity to resurrect their name in your contacts list. Whatever floats your boat. Take any of the three following examples, choose whichever one you like the best, and then calibrate the language to come across as more of the way that you speak. Would that be something that sparks your interest?

Let me know and we can talk details and get something in the calendar. Would you be interested in meeting up every now and then and cuddling up? Purely platonic, and purely awesome. Let me know if that sounds fun to you and we can talk specifics. If that sounds appealing, let me know and we can set something up in the next week or so.

Let your soon-to-be cuddle buddy about all of the things that you laid out as your ideal setup. Treat this stage as the negotiation, getting to know each other phase. When they tell you what they would like to see happen, always remember that you have the right to say no to their requests, just as they have the right to say no to yours. I was hoping that it would just be platonic. We might be looking for things that are too different after all. You get to dictate your side of the bargain.

When in doubt, talk it out. Here are some last minute tips that might help you relax that much more into the situation. Have some drinking water nearby if you think you or your cuddle buddy will want any. How long did you say you both wanted to cuddle for? Over time, how you feel about your cuddle buddy might shift or how they feel about you might shift. I hope that this guide was helpful for you and that you feel better prepared to go on with your cuddling adventures.

You have selected the Supercharge Your Sex Life product. Do you have a discount code? Click here to enter your discount code. Why Cuddling Is Awesome Cuddling is the best. First, you have to have two quick conversations with yourself about it. For example… Weird asker: So first, you have to have the conversation with yourself. And the second conversation to have with yourself starts, and ends, with this question: What is it exactly that you want from your cuddle buddy? Old crushes that never went anywhere Similar to the acquaintances, but with a bit of a sexual charge either back then, or still today.

Personally, I find that something short and sweet works best. Are Your Motivations Clean? Enjoy your cuddle session. Take some deep breaths and settle into it.

And remember… have fun! Shifting Feelings And Using Proactive Assertiveness Over time, how you feel about your cuddle buddy might shift or how they feel about you might shift. All The Cuddles, All The Time I hope that this guide was helpful for you and that you feel better prepared to go on with your cuddling adventures. Be safe, have fun, be honest, and let that delicious oxytocin flow. Dedicated to your success, Jordan. Want to encourage even more depth in your relationship?

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11 Cute Things to Say to Your Boyfriend While You Cuddle

It reduces stress, social anxiety, and lowers your blood pressure and your risk of heart disease. I researched it all. Cuddling feels good for a reason. So how exactly do you go about asking someone to cuddle with you without it being weird? Believe me, this necessary pit-stop is worth it.

The second conversation is about what exactly it is that you are looking for from your cuddle buddy arrangement. Do you think that this is a weird thing to want? Is cuddling normal, healthy, and great?

Get comfortable with how you feel about making the request first… and remember, there is nothing strange about wanting physical intimacy with someone in or outside of an intimate relationship.

You are allowed to want to cuddle. And the second conversation to have with yourself starts, and ends, with this question:. Do you want a one-time cuddle? A semi-regular cuddle buddy like once per week? Do you want the cuddling to be fully clothed?

Will kissing be allowed? If so, is kissing on the lips only allowed or just on the body? With music or no music? On a bed or on a couch? You get the drill. Dig into your desires. What is your ideal, best case scenario? What is your authentic desire in terms of your ideal cuddle setup? Sit with that until it becomes quite clear for you, and feel free to write it down somewhere to make it more concrete.

But for now, just check in with yourself, and get your best case scenario down in writing. Asking for our needs to be met in any kind of a relationship can be nerve-racking. Filtered through my personal biases, here are the top five places that I think you should search for your potential cuddle buddies. You might be surprised at their reaction. Similar to the acquaintances, but with a bit of a sexual charge either back then, or still today. Maybe you bumped into each other at a club years ago… or you matched on OKCupid or Tinder and it fizzled out… or you were both always dating other people whenever one of you happened to be single.

Whatever your history with your old crushes, this might be the perfect opportunity to resurrect their name in your contacts list. Whatever floats your boat. Take any of the three following examples, choose whichever one you like the best, and then calibrate the language to come across as more of the way that you speak. Would that be something that sparks your interest? Let me know and we can talk details and get something in the calendar. Would you be interested in meeting up every now and then and cuddling up?

Purely platonic, and purely awesome. Let me know if that sounds fun to you and we can talk specifics. If that sounds appealing, let me know and we can set something up in the next week or so. Let your soon-to-be cuddle buddy about all of the things that you laid out as your ideal setup. Treat this stage as the negotiation, getting to know each other phase. As an extra note, it seems that animals need to be cuddled too. They do it with their mother, their siblings, and with their owners if they let them.

Without the close contact, they can get depressed and feel stressed out. So, while there is no length of time to cuddle your pet for the benefits either, please make sure you at least take some time to do it! When you cuddle, dopamine is released, and that is a hormone that can help increase sexual desire. And, when you add the element of physical touch felt from head to toe, in an embrace that feels an awful lot like being sexual, it can increase the desire to have sex in both of you.

That desire can lead to the act of sex, or at the very least, the desire to have sex sometime soon. Does He Love Me? You can also face each other and wrap your legs around each other like you used to do when you were making out. Let yourself be mindful and present with your partner and enjoy the feeling of being close to them, without thoughts, judgments, anger, or other negative emotions. You may find your bodies rocking in an intimate rhythm that is extremely arousing.

There is a great video from BuzzFeed where exes cuddle again for the first time in years. In the video, you can tell that they are feeling awkward about the situation and are kind of annoyed with each other. I was listening to a professional cuddler talk — one of those people that you can cuddle at a cuddle cafe see below , and she said that a good cuddler is one that is full of unconditional love and shows affection to human beings.

Perhaps this is why cuddling with your ex is such a bad idea! Even though we know that all babies enjoy being cuddled by their mothers and other people, as it helps in the bonding process and makes them feel safe, not all adults seem to like cuddling.

Some people find it too hot. Some people find it annoying and a disruption of their space. Some people find it too much of an emotional connection. And some people find it downright terrifying. For example, some people have a fear of touching or being touched, called Haphephobia. The chances of being in a relationship with someone who has this fear is slim since they would not like to have you in their space at all, and usually the fear includes the fear of sexual assault.

Long Distance Relationship Some people have mentioned their inability to breathe while being cuddled while others have mentioned their intense desire get away from the cuddling altogether. It just may not be their thing. Not all phobias are made worse by cuddling. In fact, a series of studies published in Psychological Science found that touching an inanimate object can have a huge influence over existential fears, such as fear of death.

This includes cuddling a teddy bear. The researchers believed that touch in this way could help to treat low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety. Perhaps this is why we grab onto something when we are scared. We seem to need the comfort of something else to help us get out of our mind and feel better. Of course, there is the big and little spoon, where one person comes in behind the other, and they both tuck their knees up and line up perfectly together.

But, there are many other ways to cuddle as well. This is done facing towards each other and requires you to interlock your legs together. This is a cuddle done by laying on your backs and possibly holding hands or leaning into each other slightly.

The point is that you are close and cuddled. This is when you embrace as if you were hugging, only you are horizontal in bed.

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